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9 Words Women Use

I just wanted to share this with you all.  G-ma e-mailed it to me.  ;)

(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm.  This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.   

(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!     

(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing.   (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake. 

(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or Faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says "Thanks a lot" - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all.    DO NOT say "you're welcome" ... that will bring on a "whatever").

(8 ) Whatever: Is a women's way of saying F  YOU! 

(9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking "What's wrong?" For the woman's response refer to # 3.

haha, cute!

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You forgot "Do as you like..." This is in the same linguistic group as "Go ahead" but has evolved into an even more dangerous warning, given the ellipses. Depending on the situation at hand, they can be filled with "Do as you like...you always do" or "Do as you like, but I don't approve." Either way, the improper response has been known to lead the respondant into trial separation territory. It is recommended that the listener be on his or her toes.

In the continental US, "Do as you like..." is often expressed "Do what you want..." and of course the second half reads: "Do what you want...you will anyway."

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aww, sexism. i don't find this funny.

Yeah, I'm not a fan.  I have received this forward multiple times from friends (oh how I hate forwards anyway) and don't find it funny either.

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aww, sexism. i don't find this funny.

Yeah, I'm not a fan.  I have received this forward multiple times from friends (oh how I hate forwards anyway) and don't find it funny either.

I've been avoiding this thread after my first glance at it. I agree.

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It's not "funny" as in  :-D. However I do recognise myself in it.

I didn't say it was an attractive recognition.

Sometimes you laugh, but you don't really mock. Laughter can be caused by recognition. I freely admit that I have used just these words in just this way...in three different languages. And heard other women use them, in three different languages, in just this way.

Life.

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It's not "funny" as in  :-D. However I do recognise myself in it.

I didn't say it was an attractive recognition.

Sometimes you laugh, but you don't really mock. Laughter can be caused by recognition. I freely admit that I have used just these words in just this way...in three different languages. And heard other women use them, in three different languages, in just this way.

Life.

Whatever it is, it's still sexist. I am a woman, I don't use some of those phrases, I use some of them and don't mean what is stated, I use some of them and do mean what is stated, and my husband does the same, just as other men do. Therefore, it should be "19 words people sometimes use, and sometimes mean these things.." (there are actually 19 words in blue)

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Nicely said BayPuppy. These statements remind me of the vagina dentata (vagina with teeth):

(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm.  This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.   

(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!   

(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing.  (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake. 

Make one wrong move, and she'll bite off your... manhood. Watch out!

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just because people use language in some way--socialized or not--doesn't make it just or appropriate.

much of the difference between men and women comes from how we are socialized and, beyond just our use of words, there are other consequences for the outcomes attached to language. while it might be okay for people to think of gender as "nothing"--indeed, most of my students don't think gender inequality exists anymore, there is quite a lot of research suggesting the vast consequences attached to issues that stem from differences in how each gender is perceived, treated, and expected to do.

these 'jokes' maintain the ideology that women are irrational, vain/self centered, pissed at men (which is kinda strange, since while popular notions of gender within the "gender difference" model suggests women are helpless and need me to help them/do stuff for them/give them advice/make desisions for them whereas men are active/makes decisions/control situations/ect).

perhaps the reason some might find these "okay" jokes is because it challenges the dominate construction of gender difference, where women can/do have power over men and that men (this time around) must be on their toes not to piss us off with their foolish questions/actions.

HEAR HEAR.

In my opinion, any statement that lumps all women into a giant category is pretty sexist and offensive. A lot of the things people say about "women" certainly do not describe me, or anyone else I know for that matter. I'm pretty sure that all the women referenced in generalizations like this are fictional.

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I actually see pretty much all these phrases as applying to men and women (or at least in my experience). They'e all the sort of indirect, passive-aggressive approach to an argument... I've heard a number of these from my boyfriend (especially "fine" and "nothing")! I'm sure I'm guilty too...
I see a characterization of men as dopey, always getting in trouble, kind of thing here. But the fact is, they can be just as "pissy" as women are characterized here. I know people who do these things, but it's not to say that women do them; people do them.

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WOMEN. LOL

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aww, sexism. i don't find this funny.

That was my first thought when I first read this years ago, too. However, there have been a fair amount of studies that suggest men have a more literal minded comprehension of language, while women tend to focus on the non-verbal aspects. More of what is implied and suggested than what is literally said in some cases.

Das Wife and I have laughed over this one, and actually discussed how the misinterpretations on both our parts occur. It does need a male counterpart. Those phases that men say, not realizing what the words imply.

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