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Am I the rude one?

Ok, so I got a little pissed off at this.(Backstory) I have to take this class for work, it is 8 hours a day on Thursdays and Fridays from 9am-5pm. I work nights, from 12am-8am two days, and 8pm-8am three days a week. I also go to school full time two nights a week 4 classes. I am also pregant.

In this class for work, we all had to describe ourselves, and our schedules what we do for work ect. on the first day. Everyday I come in straight from work and am exhausted. Everyone there knows I go to school on Wednesday night from 8pm-11pm then go straight to work from 12am-8am then straight to class from 9am-5pm.

Now I am sympathetic because everyone else in this class is there because they are on unemployment. BUT...every day they complain to me about being tired because they stayed up late, complain that they have to come to class two days in a row, and in general bitch that there is too much work. So last Friday I got fed up and said that I thought it was kinda rude to complain to me about this stuff considering how much I work ect. and they all jumped down my throat, called me a bitch and said I was the rude one for complaining about having a job. UGH!!!!  >:(

Honestly, I can't believe you're complaining about this. It sounds like you work hard and it's always frustrating when people preach to the choir like that, but on the other hand being unemployed can be stressful in its own right. Next time, don't make it personal.

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I don't think that was particularly rude, I probably would have told them to stop bitching and if they hate class so much they should stop going.

Actually not really, I probably wouldn't have said anything because I tend to avoid confrontation, especially with people I barely know. But they would still annoy the hell out of me.

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Maybe instead of staying up late they should be looking for a job.  I see both sides of the arguement.  You are the one that has chosen additional school (besides what is required for your job), so I think that you've just got to live through the tiredness that is being caused by it.  For them to call you a bitch was way out of line though.

Sorry. :(

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Oh!  And I don't if you've told VW you're pregnant before this (on a diff forum), but congratulations! :)

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Listen, if I had to stay up all night half the week, I'd be so stressed I'd be jumping down everyone's throat. So, I don't think you should feel guilty about it. Just chalk it up to being tired. You're working really hard and I am impressed! I don't think they should've been name calling, but perhaps they're jealous that you have a job in this tough economy? I don't know. Everyone has their own problems.

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How did you respond?

If people get offended, go Simon Cowell on them.  That's been my strategy for a decade (which means Simon Cowell goes hh, since I predate him) and people tend to stop looking for ways to be offended, seeing as I don't care about their drama.

This is my interpretation of their complaints:
1.  Staying up late:  poor decision making and time management;
2.  Class two days in a row:  lack of persepctive (if they had a job, they'd likely have work commitments three to five days in a row); and
3.  Class involves a lot of work:  lack of initiative (classes do involve a lot of work, suck it)

Did you mention that if they couldn't handle two days of class they wouldn't be able to handle your job, even if it were offered to them?

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I probably would have flew off the handle too... I work overnight only 1 day a week and it completely fucks with me... In general most people just love to bitch and complain, some more than others... I totally respect you for working so hard and I know how it is... You go girl LOL... If anything, just apologize to the lazies and say you were tired/ prenatal to avoid them ganging up on you and you feeling uncomfortable in class that's all I can really advise

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I went to a really expensive private liberal arts college (thank you, scholarships!) and most of the people there didn't have to have jobs (and most didn't even qualify for federal workstudy). I worked 30 hours a week in addition to a full class load, and it was hard for me to keep my cool when people couldn't even show up to class because they were hungover. I only drank one time in college--I didn't have time to fool around! With more reflection I realized how irritating this was, and I just can't blame you whatsoever for getting upset in your situation. It's hard to push yourself to your limit and then watch people who do a third of what you do bitch about how hard their lives are.

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Thanks to everyone for listening to my ranting, I guess I am a little emotional, but I was pretty upset. To Catski, it was personal because these people were not bitching in general, they were addressing me when doing so. I appreciate how hard it is to be unemployed, my husband was layed off a couple of years ago, and was out of work and on unemployment for 6 months. BUT...the people in this class were taking it in lue of a job search, so in essence the class was being payed for by the state, and they were being paid unemployment benefits to go to class twice a week, and do the work. As a taxpayer and a really hard working person in general I found it offensive for them to bitch to me about being tired and having to spend 16 hours a week (while not looking for a job) to recieve a full week of pay...especially when half the time the reason they were tired is because they stayed up all night drinking or playing video games (their words not mine). It also became personal when a classroom full of 10 guys called me a bitch.

Wow...am I a psyho pregant lunatic or what! lol

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I'm reading The Four Agreements, and one of the agreements is to not take anything personally. You have no control over how other people respond or act. They weren't really attacking YOU, per se, but were probably being defensive because they are unemployed and feel threatened by you because you are working so hard.
When people criticize others, it really means they are criticizing themselves.

The book is pretty good, after the intro anyway. I've only read the first agreement, which is to be impeccable with your words.

The next one is about not taking things personally.

And congrats on your pregnancy!

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Thanks to everyone for listening to my ranting, I guess I am a little emotional, but I was pretty upset. To Catski, it was personal because these people were not bitching in general, they were addressing me when doing so. I appreciate how hard it is to be unemployed, my husband was layed off a couple of years ago, and was out of work and on unemployment for 6 months. BUT...the people in this class were taking it in lue of a job search, so in essence the class was being payed for by the state, and they were being paid unemployment benefits to go to class twice a week, and do the work. As a taxpayer and a really hard working person in general I found it offensive for them to bitch to me about being tired and having to spend 16 hours a week (while not looking for a job) to recieve a full week of pay...especially when half the time the reason they were tired is because they stayed up all night drinking or playing video games (their words not mine). It also became personal when a classroom full of 10 guys called me a bitch.

Wow...am I a psyho pregant lunatic or what! lol

See, with more information I can see why you kicked off. I'm just a little touchy on the subject because my flatmate and a lot of my peers spent ages job-hunting after we all graduated last summer and no few people took the road of, "You shouldn't be going out with your friends/buying that book/taking a day off job-hunting. This is why you're unemployed." It's sometimes hard to tell which way someone's going to go on that one.

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It's called LIFE. Deal with it.

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Thanks to everyone for listening to my ranting, I guess I am a little emotional, but I was pretty upset. To Catski, it was personal because these people were not bitching in general, they were addressing me when doing so. I appreciate how hard it is to be unemployed, my husband was layed off a couple of years ago, and was out of work and on unemployment for 6 months. BUT...the people in this class were taking it in lue of a job search, so in essence the class was being payed for by the state, and they were being paid unemployment benefits to go to class twice a week, and do the work. As a taxpayer and a really hard working person in general I found it offensive for them to bitch to me about being tired and having to spend 16 hours a week (while not looking for a job) to recieve a full week of pay...especially when half the time the reason they were tired is because they stayed up all night drinking or playing video games (their words not mine). It also became personal when a classroom full of 10 guys called me a bitch.

Wow...am I a psyho pregant lunatic or what! lol

See, with more information I can see why you kicked off. I'm just a little touchy on the subject because my flatmate and a lot of my peers spent ages job-hunting after we all graduated last summer and no few people took the road of, "You shouldn't be going out with your friends/buying that book/taking a day off job-hunting. This is why you're unemployed." It's sometimes hard to tell which way someone's going to go on that one.

I can see that, and I know it can be hard. Everyone needs to unwind and take time for themselves, because unemployment is very stressful. I feel for those who are really struggling. But I guess I should have provided more info...for instance the guy that really started it off, had spent the day before bragging about his computer (this is a computer class) and all of the money he put into it for a advanced cooling system. This, he explained is neccesary because you need one if you are going to play call of duty for 8 hours every day. Those are the type of people that ofend me when complaining to me about being tired and having to take a 2 day class a week.

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It's called LIFE. Deal with it.

Wow! I had never thought of it that way...gee thanks for that gem of wisdom! All of your "friend" must come to you for advice and comfort.

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Oh!  And I don't if you've told VW you're pregnant before this (on a diff forum), but congratulations! :)

Thank You!

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It's called LIFE. Deal with it.

Wow! I had never thought of it that way...gee thanks for that gem of wisdom! All of your "friend" must come to you for advice and comfort.

I really don't understand why you made this thread. You came in, asked a question and then quickly convince all to take your side. Someone challenges this with an honest (possibly brutal) opinion and you flame them. Well done, girly. Your whining just makes you come across as insecure. Why do you care what they think? They're jobless idiots who complain about having to do ANYTHING. If you get worked up over petty life situations, you're going to be miserable. I don't let people/things/life get me down. It's just life, and life is a beautiful thing. If there's one thing I don't want it's to reflect back on my life with any regret. I'm blunt, rude, asshole-ish, etc. a lot of the time but I'm also compassionate, loving, caring, and a damn good friend. My friends come to me when they want an honest, no-bullshit opinion on something and I give it to them. Sugarcoating is not my cup of tea. Hate me or whatever, but I stand by my first statement.

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Sugarcoating is not my cup of tea.

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It's called LIFE. Deal with it.

Wow! I had never thought of it that way...gee thanks for that gem of wisdom! All of your "friend" must come to you for advice and comfort.

I really don't understand why you made this thread. You came in, asked a question and then quickly convince all to take your side. Someone challenges this with an honest (possibly brutal) opinion and you flame them. Well done, girly. Your whining just makes you come across as insecure. Why do you care what they think? They're jobless idiots who complain about having to do ANYTHING. If you get worked up over petty life situations, you're going to be miserable. I don't let people/things/life get me down. It's just life, and life is a beautiful thing. If there's one thing I don't want it's to reflect back on my life with any regret. I'm blunt, rude, asshole-ish, etc. a lot of the time but I'm also compassionate, loving, caring, and a damn good friend. My friends come to me when they want an honest, no-bullshit opinion on something and I give it to them. Sugarcoating is not my cup of tea. Hate me or whatever, but I stand by my first statement.

Well, let me just say this. Perhaps like many people on this website, I come here to air frustrations, or to just have friends who will lend an ear. You have been around on this site for quite a while, and  it is a fact that MANY vegwebbers come here and post threads about things that bother them/upset them ect....we all live in the real world every day and understand that it is not perfect, but everyone needs a place to vent and perhaps you should understand that. And by the way, I asked a specific question in my post...was I the one being rude? If you had posted an answer to that question then ok, maybe you did think I was, but you did not...you just made a rude comment yourself, so I should ask you...then why did you feel the need to respond at all to this thread? And thank you for pointing out my insecurities...I truly hope that you never feel that way.

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i think he was just being his usual funny smart ass self... which i love btw... i wouldn't be too upset by it... he's just more of the tough love approach lol...

but just keep being u! don't let the lazies drag u down... all this hard work will pay off for u one day... i know that it is way annoying to hear people complaining about how hard their not so hard life is but just try to ignore them... your motivation will pay off in the long run

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