Innocent Mistakes?
First off, apologies if this is in the wrong sub-forum, but it seemed right.
I got home from work today and saw that my mom had bought a jar of tomatillo salsa...it was sitting on the table. I'm sure she bought it for me because last week I had mentioned I wanted to try making a tomatillo salsa. I imagine she saw it in the grocery store, remembered I wanted to try it, and picked it up.
Here's the unfortunate part: I scanned the ingredients, and way up top I find chicken broth with chicken fat, chicken base, cooked chicken and chicken juices in the parentheses.
Now I know she wouldn't have knowingly gotten me chickened-up salsa...I sometimes forget that most people don't study an ingredients list like I do. But I can't figure out how to approach the situation. Part of me realizes that rationally I'm not doing any harm by consuming--the damage is done, the product's been purchased. But at the same time, I really don't want to eat something with chickens in it. And if I start making exceptions now, it's a slippery slope.
So has anyone been in a situation where someone bought you a gift that you just can't consume because of your ethics? The person, of course, is only being nice. How have you handled it? Any ideas?
Well, just say to her (something like) "oh man, sorry mom..but it looks like this has chicken products in it. I'd rather not eat it, would you like to eat it, take it back, or do you want me to give it away?" If she doesn't care, give it to someone. Thank her for thinking of you.
My question is, who puts chicken anything in salsa? Isn't salsa supposed to be just veggies and/or fruit?
Yeah, be nice but don't feel obligated to eat it if you don't want to. She honestly probably didn't realise.
What is chicken anything doing in salsa? That makes no sense at all.
And I would just tell her that you dont want to eat it because it contains chicken.
You'll get used to this. It's like going to someone's house for a dinner party or something and they've made food with ingredients you don't eat. Yes, it's a bit uncomfortable, but most people you only have to tell once and they'll remember the next time (unless it's my boyfriend's stepmother...). Make sure you tell her it was so sweet to get the salsa for you (and again--CHICKEN in salsa? WTF?), but you can't use it. You can probably take it back to the store, if she still has the receipt.
It's uncomfortable, but it's even worse when someone has spent time making a homemade dish you can't eat. I always worry I am going to hurt their feelings, and if it's someone I don't see very often, I might not say anything and just not eat the whatever and give it away. My boyfriend's mom always gives us chocolates with milk. We've told her numerous times we can't eat them, but she doesn't get it. So, I don't worry about it anymore and I just give the chocolates to my mom (an omni).
I agree with everyone else Andini. I would thank her for the gesture but politely inform her that it contains chicken and that you can't eat it. Once you start making exceptions, you start entering the world of being a flexitarian. Just as VeganRun stated, it can be compared to going to a dinner party with chicken wings and meatballs, don't undermine your principles for the sake of being nice.
My mom does that all the time. Sometimes she reads it and sometimes she brings it home and says, "hey, I didn't read this, so make sure you do."
my mom is really good with that kind of stuff, though.
I have had other people buy me things without realizing I can't eat it. I just bring it home and give it to someone else.
i.e. I got a bag of candy during graduation and I couldn't eat any of it. I didn't even know it was there.
i think a lot of tomatillo salsa has chicken products.
i usually discourage people from doing anything for me food wise both since i am a vegan and because i try to make food a non-issue. i have had it happen though and i have just told people i can't eat it.
huh, i never read labels on the salsas i buy. i should start i guess. i'm amazed there was chicken in it. wtf!
I read the label of everything I buy because they will sneak some weird animal product in some very unsuspecting products.
yeah, some salsa verdes are made with chicken stock. =/
My mom has bought stuff for me before that turned out not to be vegan; it happened a lot more often at first. Initially she'd say something like "well I already bought it!" but eventually she got the hang of checking ingredients if she wanted to get me something. It was never much of an issue if something didn't turn out to be vegan because there were other people in the house who'd eat it. Now if it happens I just tell her - dude there's chicken in this salsa! and she's equally as dismayed as I am. And then we feed it to my brother.
For going over other people's places, depending on what the event is, I either offer to bring food (both as a gesture and a back-up plan if their "vegan" thing isn't vegan) or it's an event that I don't really expect to eat much at anyway (kid's birthday party or whatever). I guess I don't go to events often, but it's not as much of an issue now as before when I was nervous about it and didn't know how to handle it.
huh, i never read labels on the salsas i buy. i should start i guess. i'm amazed there was chicken in it. wtf!
I read the label of everything I buy because they will sneak some weird animal product in some very unsuspecting products.
same, and I take it a step further, that if there is something I don't understand or the ingredients list is a mile long I won't buy it.
Your mom's heart was in the right place but as a vegan we don't eat anything that has meat, eggs, or milk in it it doesn't matter if it was just purchased.
Try to find the receipt thank your mom explain to her it has meat in it and that your going to return it and get something else. If you can't find the receipt give it to someone.
That's what I would do.