Funerals
So, the 'killing some time thread' got me thinking. A lot of people stated that they don't want a funeral and I was wondering if they meant none at all or the typical solemn cryfest. I have lost many friends and relatives the last few years. Ive been to an average of three funerals a year for the last 11 years :( so I've seen the good, the bad, and the ugly of funerals. Open caskets just plain creep me out. I flat out refuse to view them.
I absolutely don't want the traditional religious everyone standing around crying thing. But I have been to several that were truly great. Lots of storytelling, pictures, eating and drinking. I think it can be nice for people to get that kind of closure, especially when you don't get to say goodbye.
I would like to be cremated and have half of my ashes spread in a skydiving ceremony and half at sea, somewhere warm.
I hope I did this right. It's my first poll. BP any pointers?
I want no services whatsoever. I want to be cremated, and my ashes spread back in Illinois. Not that I'm terribly attached to IL, but that's where my story began. I am not afraid to be heard, or barring that, just state my opinion, but I have never enjoyed being the center of attention. As for any mourners... I hope that my kids will be able to grieve with each other, and their families. Basically though, I just want everyone I leave behind to remember the good times. I hope that is enough closure for my loved ones. I've always hated formalities and expectations... so I guess I'm just staying true to myself.
Oh, this subject brings up a lot of "stuff" for me... especially since you posted it, Tanevab. Your picture always reminds me of a friend that I didn't get to say goodbye to years ago.
I am a "none" person. Funerals require time and a huge amount of money, neither of which I want my family or friends wasting on me when I'm gone.
I too want no funeral when I die. I wish it were legal to just take my dead lifeless body and dump it in the ocean off of Montauk Point so I could become food for the fishes....... ??? ;)
Today, Oct. 10th is the 1 year anniversary of my father's passing away.....I was just at his grave up in NY this past weekend.....looking around while I was there.....it struck me as what a HUGE waste of space grave yards are.... :P
.....it struck me as what a HUGE waste of space grave yards are.... :P
I feel he same way. The only purpose I really see them providing is at least it's one more spot they can't put a subdivision.
I think funerals offer closure for family and friends though. You can have a "green" burial, but still have a funeral where people can come together and grieve your loss together.
I am a "none" person. Funerals require time and a huge amount of money, neither of which I want my family or friends wasting on me when I'm gone.
I guess I feel that they don't have to be. I have been to more than one funeral that was just a big potluck in someones backyard with an urn. BTW, I'm not trying to change your mind just pointing out that there other options than expensive funeral homes.
My husband wants to be burned on a small wooden boat at sea, Viking style. I don't care if it'll legal or not. I'm doing it for him. The "sea" might end up being a pond in some backwoods place though but he'll take what he gets!
Then he wants everyone to have a party.
I'm donating my body to science.
My husband wants to be burned on a small wooden boat at sea, Viking style. I don't care if it'll legal or not. I'm doing it for him. The "sea" might end up being a pond in some backwoods place though but he'll take what he gets!
Then he wants everyone to have a party.
I love that idea.
I'm donating my body to science.
That prompted me to add another option.
My husband wants to be burned on a small wooden boat at sea, Viking style. I don't care if it'll legal or not. I'm doing it for him. The "sea" might end up being a pond in some backwoods place though but he'll take what he gets!
Then he wants everyone to have a party.
I'm donating my body to science.
Jennifer,
I love your husbands idea ;)....though I know that if my friends did the same for me ( set a boat on fire and pushed it out into a pond)....somehow it would make it across to the other side...and start a forest fire. ::)
I'm donating my body to science.
That prompted me to add another option.
I think that's a great idea as well....
But now I can't change my vote...... :P :D
I love your husbands idea ;)....though I know that if my friends did the same for me ( set a boat on fire and pushed it out into a pond)....somehow it would make it across to the other side...and start a forest fire. ::)
That's funny. I was thinking something along the same lines. I SURE that there would be alcohol involved and I'm sure they would find some way to F%$# it up. And I'm sure it would end up on youtube ;D :D And then some where down the line it would turn into remember when.....and everyone would sit back and have a good chuckle :) Oh well as long as I don't have to clean up the mess.
I'm donating my body to science.
That prompted me to add another option.
I think that's a great idea as well....
But now I can't change my vote...... :P :D
I don't know how to get it to let you change votes. Any one have any ideas?
I'm donating my body to science.
That prompted me to add another option.
I think that's a great idea as well....
But now I can't change my vote...... :P :D
Yeah I think it's kind of vegan-ish.
I mean, maybe this isn't logical but if everyone donated their body to science maybe it would somehow alleviate society's need to test on animals? I think in a small way it might. And it's very humanistic. A dead body can't do anything, but actually it can. It can help a doctor to practice surgery or whatever.
I mean, maybe this isn't logical but if everyone donated their body to science maybe it would somehow alleviate society's need to test on animals? I think in a small way it might. And it's very humanistic. A dead body can't do anything, but actually it can. It can help a doctor to practice surgery or whatever.
That's a really interesting thought.. I wonder...
Funerals are such a financial burden. Spend thousands of dollars on a box that's going to be placed into the ground anyway..makes no sense.
Close friends and family members can pay tribute to my life, but I'd like the most "natural" burial possible..just put my body in the ground, let nature take its course.
I mean, it sounds a little gruesome, but decomposition will inevitably occur, so why bother with a coffin? Let the body contribute to fertilization, the various creatures/organisms around. Putting one in a box is really just delaying the process.
Funerals are such a financial burden. Spend thousands of dollars on a box that's going to be placed into the ground anyway..makes no sense.
Close friends and family members can pay tribute to my life, but I'd like the most "natural" burial possible..just put my body in the ground, let nature take its course.
I mean, it sounds a little gruesome, but decomposition will inevitably occur, so why bother with a coffin? Let the body contribute to fertilization, the various creatures/organisms around. Putting one in a box is really just delaying the process.
This is a past thread you might enjoy.
http://vegweb.com/index.php?topic=18659.0
Check out the website listed in the first paragraph.
I was following that thread a while ago, and it actually sparked a conversation between me and my husband - figure it's never too early to let loved ones know what you want done. Though I did have to preface the conversation with "Okay..this may sound a little morbid, but stick with me here..." ::)
I was following that thread a while ago, and it actually sparked a conversation between me and my husband - figure it's never too early to let loved ones know what you want done. Though I did have to preface the conversation with "Okay..this may sound a little morbid, but stick with me here..." ::)
One thing I highly recommend is having everything in writing. It's free and easy. I teach medlaw and it amazes me how many people are just plain unprepared. It's great that you have talked about it. it's a good start but if it is in writing no court or other family member can dispute it.
At the very least you should have a living will and healcare proxy. Make sure you spell it out. It can also be helpful to have your healthcare proxy not be a family member. That way a family member doesn't have to be in the position of 'pulling the plug'
Also if you want to donate your body to science make sure you have that arranged too so it can go to an establishment that you approve of.
funerals and burials really are pretty wasteful. memorial services are great though, and should be a time to remember and celebrate the life of the deceased. I'd definitely want some event of that nature after I die. but as for my body....
after reading "Stiff: The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers" by Mary Roach, I'm pretty sure I want to donate my body to science/medical research. Not only will it save my family the cost of body disposal, but it will serve as an educational tool for some med student or even automobile safety research & development.
One thing I highly recommend is having everything in writing. It's free and easy. I teach medlaw and it amazes me how many people are just plain unprepared. It's great that you have talked about it. it's a good start but if it is in writing no court or other family member can dispute it.
At the very least you should have a living will and healcare proxy. Make sure you spell it out. It can also be helpful to have your healthcare proxy not be a family member. That way a family member doesn't have to be in the position of 'pulling the plug'
Also if you want to donate your body to science make sure you have that arranged too so it can go to an establishment that you approve of.
Those are things I never would have thought of, but can definately see are important. Thanks for sharing .
I want my body to be naturally buried. I want no formaldahyde in my veins, I want to be burried with my own blood, I feel strongly about that. As far as a casket, a plain pine box would be ideal, burried at the foot of a mountain in the Alaskan Range, with the only grave marker is a tree planted over my grave, a sapling. I see it as my life force will go into the tree and I will not be tuely dead because I still live in that tree. I have always had a special fondness for trees.
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