kinda weird that i'm posting this on here, but when i realized i needed to talk to friends, this is where I ended up.

My bff Erin just called from Indiana, and it's super late out there, so I knew it wasn't a good call. Her youngest sister (my old roommate) died. Jenny died. She was cleaning the bathroom, and she closed the door, then Mom found her, all blue. and she was dead. i heard erin tell me that jenny is dead. and i can say it. but my mind isn't working right now, so it's not really processing this, so i'm just sitting here, staring into my closet?  i'm driving to Davis tomorrow, we'll find out autopsy results hopefully tomorrow. i just... my brain won't work, and i guess i thought if i typed it out, it would be more real. and it's not, and that's kinda freaking me out. i've only had patients die, not close friends my age, not my other family. so. there's that.